Top Ten

May 22, 2015 | Dian Chaaban


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David Letterman announced his retirement from "The Late Show" after 20 years on Wednesday night this week. I think I speak on behalf of many when I say that his nightly Top 10 lists were a favourite – so, in honor of his retirement, here is a Top Ten list of services included in your management fee as a Dominion Securities client:

 

  1. A customized and holistic wealth management strategy that extends beyond investing to encompass financial planning, retirement planning, business planning, risk management and estate planning. This is achieved by having hired highly accredited tax, legal and financial professionals in house to meet with you as a complimentary service when it makes sense – offering you integrated wealth management solutions you would normally only expect to find at a family office.
  2. Collaboration with your existing professional advisors, such as lawyers and accountants, to integrate your investment plans
  3. A fully personalized IPS (investment policy statement) and written financial plan
  4. To help build your long-term wealth, I have full access to the brilliant RBC DS Portfolio Advisory Group – the largest of its kind in Canada. This team of highly specialized equity and fixed-income portfolio advisors conducts ongoing research and analysis for us every day on a wide spectrum of investment opportunities and proactive ideas – providing you with the confidence in knowing that your portfolio is being managed proactively in today’s quickly changing investment climate.
  5. Secure 24/7 access to your accounts, instant transfers, paperless estatements, exclusive investment research, quarterly market outlook, RBC Economics publications, Reuters market news, real-time quotes, customized watchlists and more through DS Online.
  6. An annual consolidated tax reporting package (which your accountant will love you for)
  7. An ongoing discovery process with recommendations, client engagement, education and regular review meetings.
  8. Invitations to exclusive events & educational seminars
  9. One-stop-shop: I’ve built an extensive network of trusted partners including bankers, lawyers, accountants, business coaches, consultants, real estate agents, health & wellness gurus, caterers, event planners, florists, travel agents, stylists, golf pros, wine connoisseurs, you name it. Go ahead, ask me anything.
  10. It’s a family affair. It’s important to me that those who are close to you are also looked after. If at any point you feel that your family or friends aren’t on track, I am more than happy to spend some time with them to ensure that all of their bases are covered. This is a no obligation favor to you – which you can ask for any time.

Of particular humor was Letterman’s star studded final Top Ten List, in where he enlisted 10 celebrity friends to roast him with “Top Ten Things I’ve Always Wanted to Say To Dave.” Here they are:

 

10. Alec Baldwin: “Of all the talk shows, yours is most geographically convenient to my home.”
9. Barbara Walters: “Did you know that you wear the same cologne as Muammar Gaddafi?”
8. Steve Martin: “Your extensive plastic surgery was a necessity and a mistake.”
7. Jerry Seinfeld: “I have no idea what I’ll do when you go off the air… You know, I just thought of something–I’ll be fine.”
6. Jim Carrey: “Honestly, Dave, I’ve always found you to be a bit of an over-actor.”
5. Chris Rock: “I’m just glad your show is being given to another white guy.”
4. Julia Louis-Dreyfus: “Thanks for letting me take part in another hugely disappointing series finale.”
3. Peyton Manning: “You are to comedy what I am to comedy.”
2. Tina Fey: “Thanks for finally proving men can be funny.”
1. Bill Murray: “Dave, I’ll never have the money I owe you.”