My 16-year old son and I took a walk through the neighbourhood last weekend, the latest instalment in our weekly series of ‘Let’s get away from our screens and talk about Important Things, while Mum tries not to trip over her own feet’. Spoiler alert: mere steps from the house I went down like a sack of potatoes thanks to an unspotted mud puddle.

Usually, our conversation consists of how school is going, or how ill-behaved the dog continues to be, but this week he surprised me by glumly stating, “I will never be able to afford a house.”

This was a topic we had never before discussed, and I was surprised that he, as a teenager, was already thinking about leaving his loving, if slightly over-protective mother, behind. I asked what had prompted that thought; grimacing, he pointed to a small, post-war bungalow as we walked past. It was up for sale, and the asking price was a hair under $1.7 million. It was a perfectly serviceable home, but the agent had listed it as a ‘land sale’, a ‘perfect spot to build a dream home’.

“You know, you can live at home as long as you need to,” I replied. He looked like he might throw up.

Average home prices in the GTA, according to the Toronto Regional Real Estate Board, climbed to an all-time high in October. With a tight supply and high demand, the average selling price hit $1,155,345. Add to this the expectation that the Bank of Canada will begin to raise rates in early 2022, and we are seeing more people rushing to lock in their mortgage pre-approvals.

The Bank of Mum and Dad has increasingly stepped in to try and help the kids get on the property ladder. In Toronto, a recent report showed that on average, $130,000 was gifted to our children as they bid on property after property. (Come to think of it, I attributed my tumble and bruised knee to a mud puddle - but upon further reflection, perhaps it’s more likely thanks to the realization that, with two sons, I will be on the hook for at least $260,000, and that’s before inflation. Note to self: I can never retire).

Is all hope lost for the first-time homeowner? Not necessarily, but it does appear that an ability to compromise and an adjustment to expectations might be in order. A GTA homebuyer will need to show some flexibility in terms of location and perhaps the type of housing being sought. That pre-war bungalow I mentioned earlier? The reason it is listed as a ‘land sale’ is because it is in a supposedly highly sought-after location, the house has 8’ foot ceilings (apparently an abomination!), three smaller bedrooms without walk-in closets or ensuite bathrooms (OMG), and a kitchen that most likely hasn’t been updated since the 1990s. To me, these all seem like petty annoyances, but it seems that in today’s hot market, the house should appear in the pages of Architectural Digest in order to be livable. Growing up, my Mum and Dad always told me I couldn’t have everything at once, but it seems like a lot of people in the property market have forgotten this lesson.

Perhaps it makes most sense to look beyond the GTA, to some of those areas that are on a commuter line, with more reasonable pricing. Perhaps a condo, townhouse or semi-detached home is a more affordable possibility. Renting is also a viable option – in effect, waiting for a better entry point into the housing market.

There is an affordability crisis in the GTA when it comes to housing – I don’t think that’s up for debate – and no one wants to be asked to lower expectations when it comes to most likely the largest investment they will ever make. Unfortunately, that may be precisely what is required for some time to come.